If you're one who has stayed within the female
hostel of any Nigerian University, you'll find that
most of it's occupants share similar hopes and
dreams- and no, it's not to excel in their chosen
career paths.
One of the lecturers in my school aptly described
women as 'a waste of education'...no, it wasn't an
insult, it was just stating the obvious. You find a
woman who has hustled through primary, secondary
and University education. One who looked set to be
a force to reckon with in the world of business or
law or medicine, I mean a female with straight A's
and you think Nigerian women may be getting
things right, only to follow her back to her hostel
and hear these heart-breaking words:
"Omo, after school na to find husband marry
remain."
In the real sense of the word this is translated to:
"After school, I'll fling my degee inside one iron
box in my dad's storeroom, find a perfect mugu
that will put a ring on my finger, buy me a car, set
up a boutique/beauty saloon for me and all I have
to do to get this is spread my legs for him and
push out little people with his DNA"
Nigerian women view marriage the same way
hustling Nigerian men view the US Green Card- an
avenue to escape life's troubles. So in the same
way you find 23 year old Nigerian men marrying 56
year old American women, you find young,
promising women relegated to some man's priority
list.
I don't think most Nigerian women realise that
nobody wants to get attached to a leech. If you
allow some Nigerian women, they would even want
their husbands to carry the babies and birth them
as well. And when you ask why they don't want to
build wealth with a man, you hear:
"I've already suffered in my father's house. I
don't want to continue suffering in my husband's
house"
Now unless you're getting married to a no-good
leech like yourself, there is no reason why building
wealth with a man should be termed 'suffering'
Even on Sun Newspaper's 'Beauty Of The Week' it's
the same thing.
Future Ambition: Getting Married And Having Kids
If you think God put you on this earth to make a
liability of yourself, you need to think again. There
is more to life than being someone's baby mama.
There is a purpose for getting an education that
lies beyond being able to speak good english
whenever you and your man attend social functions
Nigerian women need to sit down and re-evaluate
their lives. God sent you to assist a man, not to
add to his problems. Men appreciate women who can
think for themselves, who want to contribute to
the family (and I don't mean churning out kids).
There is nothing more endearing than a smart
woman who views men as companions rather than
money bags.
Don't waste the education your parents worked so
hard to provide for you. Break the stereotype,
Nigerian women should be more than gold-digging
leeches. If the likes of Oby Ezekwesili, Joke Silva,
NOI can be successful career women as well as
wives and mothers, then we all need to dust up our
certificates and CVs and have proper future
ambitions
BY-ngozi.n.okoli
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