Ekene Uzoigwe's Blog

SOME WRONG REASONS FOR GETTING MARRIED-

The choice of a life partner is one of the greatest 
test you must pass-through.
The choice of a life partner will have a long,long 
impart on everything you do, and everything you 
will ever become inlife.
The person you chose to go with in life as a partner 
will determine either you will make HEAVEN or go 
to HELL. 
1.BECAUSE OF LUST-Some wants to to marry all 
because of sex.When you get married on the 
foundation of sex and your partner cannot stand 
you,so they start going outside because they are 
not satisfied.So that marriage BREAKS UP. 
2.LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT-When you just see 
someone you have not met in life and you say,I 
feel that you are my wife or my husband. 
3.LIKE THE IDEA OF MARRIAGE-When you say,I 
just want to have a woman standing beside me as 
we walk on the street.(e.g)When they ask you why 
do you like the army,you say the uniform looks so 
goo,you forget that when there is war.You will be 
sent to the war to fight and you may get killed or 
live. 
4.FEAR OF REMAINING UNMARRIED-When you 
being to count your age from 21 to 28 and you 
have not yet find anyone suitable for you,you start 
being fearful.You will begin to to say,what do I 
need to change?maybe my hairstyle or my way or 
walking. 
The kind of fear have made many glorious woman 
get married to a mistake person.Psalm 37:5;Prov 
3:5;2 Cor 10:12.Stop saying my junior sister have 
married and am yet to marry. 
5.PRESSURE-Its a great mistake to just sit down 
and write down that by so and so month,I must get 
married.You have personally without God Almighty 
fixed a date or stage in your life,when that day 
begins to get close to you and nothing seems to 
happen.You begin to get ANXIOUS,then 
ANXIETY,then AGITATION follows then PANIC from 
that stage you do a great mistake. 
6.ESCAPE FROM BEING JILTED-Maybe you have 
been jilted by somebody in the past and nw you 
have seen another person,its not a reason to rush 
into marriage.A real man will never jilt a woman. 
7.BECAUSE OF MONEY-How can you be marrying 
someone all because of money. 
Money can buy spectacle but can't but eyes,money 
can buy bed but can't buy sleep,money can buy 
pews for you in a church but can't buy you 
salvation,money can buy food but can't but 
appetit,money can buy text books but can't buy 
brain.There are so many things that money cannot 
buy.Money does not guarantee happiness in 
marriage. 
8.ESCAPE ROOT-Many have use their getting 
married as a root to escape from their parents or 
family members.They say,am tired of my 
parents,the work am doing at home is too 
much.When I get married now,I won't be able to 
get disturb by their useless odd jobs.Many of such 
people later find out that they are just jumping 
from fire pan to fire. 
9.OUT OF PITY-You don't marry someone out of 
pity,its never going to work out in such way.I knw a 
man who married a lady because she was an orphan 
only to get married to a witch,who turn his life 
into a miserable story.They now beg for food 
before they can eat. 
What a tragedy to marry out of pity. 
10.BEAUTY OR HANDSOMENESS-Any marriage 
establish on that level will never stand.Many ladies 
are make-up human not natural beauty. 
11.TRIBAL CONNECTION-Some people will only 
want to get married to somebody from their town 
or their village or their clan. 
This is always very wrong.Let God lead you. 
12.PARENTAL SATISFACTION-Maybe your dad 
works for a rich man or his rich friend because of 
connection now wants you to get married to his 
son.That happens many times. 
13.TO HURT YOUR PARENTS-When you get hook to 
somebody all because you want to hurt your 
parents. 
14.ACCIDENTAL PREGNANCY-Because you were 
pregnant for somebody is not a reason to go ahead 
to get married to that person.Well,you have made 
a mistake,you have had a child of fornication which 
the Bible calls a Bastard.There are plenty of this 
events today in the world and even among children 
of God. 
15.FOOLISH EXPECTATIONS-To get married to an 
unbeliever or a non christian and be expecting  you will change the person.Are you the one who 
save yourself? 
You see a man while still in courtship that before 
you say anything,he slaps you and beat you up and 
you are still expecting him to change,am sorry,they 
don't normaly change but rather get worse.That is 
very bad and foolish expectation that are always 
filled with regret. 
You need to cry to God now. 
O GOD MY FATHER,WHERE OTHERS HAVE 
FAILED,I WILL MAKE IT IN JESUS NAME,AMEN.
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SOME WRONG REASONS FOR GETTING MARRIED-

The choice of a life partner is one of the greatest test you must pass-through. The choice of a life partner will have a long,long impart on everything you do, and everything you will ever become inli…

25 Mar 2015

PERSISTENCE AND DETERMINATION, ARE A KEY INGREDIENT FOR YOUR SUCCESS

"Nothing in the world, can take the place of 
PERSISTENCE and DETERMINATION: 
Talent will not; nothing is more common, than 
unsuccessful people with talent. 
Genius will not; un rewarded genius is almost a 
proverb. 
Education will not; the world is full of educated 
derelicts. PERSISTENCE and DETERMINATION 
alone, are almost omnipotent. Now I'm not saying 
you should not get an education, but you can have 
an education, and be weak inside, and never 
experience the opportunity that education could 
have provided for you, because you just didn't 
have the persistence and determination to make it 
happen." 
-----Attributed to Calvin Coolidge 30th President 
of the USA.
The Apostle Peter (in 2 Peter 1:5), gives a list of 
qualities, that you have to "ADD" to your faith, if 
you are going to be a success. Some of these 
qualities, could be captured as "persistence and 
determination". 
You have to be PERSISTENT: 
It does not matter how many times, you are turned 
down. If you are trying to get a qualification or 
pass an exam, don't quit just because you failed; 
try again, and again, and again! If you are trying 
to get a job, don't quit because you got a 
rejection. If you are trying to build your career, 
don't quit because some guy at work shouted at 
you! 
If you are trying to build a business, don't quit 
simply because the business climate is bad, in your 
community. Or, because someone let you down. Or, 
because your government did not do something for 
you. 
Maybe you lost your job, and you have been looking, 
and looking and looking. Don't give up! 
You might have even gone bankrupt..... Start 
again. Don't quit! 
You have to be DETERMINED: 
A good boxer knows, that being knocked down does 
not mean you are out.....you get up, and carry on 
fighting, with even greater determination.
DONT QUIT NOW!!!
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PERSISTENCE AND DETERMINATION, ARE A KEY INGREDIENT FOR YOUR SUCCESS

"Nothing in the world, can take the place of PERSISTENCE and DETERMINATION: Talent will not; nothing is more common, than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; un rewarded genius is almost…

21 Mar 2015

NYSC: Requirements For Mobilization Of Graduates 2015

This is to inform all prospective corps members, 
i.e. Nigerians who have graduated from 
Universities and Mono/Polytechnics both at home 
and abroad that the NYSC On-line registration 
portal will be opened from Monday 2nd March to 
Saturday 4th April, 2015 to enable them register 
for the 2015 Batch ‘A’ mobilization. 
In order to ensure a seamless registration, 
prospective corps members are to note the 
following for strict compliance:
See Also: NYSC Mobilization Time Table For 2015 
Batch A
The Website address is any of the following: 
www.nysc.gov.ng 
www.nysc.org.ng 
www.portal.nysc.gov.ng
Prospective Corps members should ensure that 
they have functional e-mail addresses with 
valid password and Nigerian (GSM) telephone 
numbers with which to register
Locally trained prospective Corps members 
are expected to use correct JAMB and 
Matriculation numbers to register
For locally-trained graduates, only those 
whose names appear in the Senate/Academic 
Board Approved Result lists submitted by 
their Institutions will have access to the NYSC 
portal.
Prospective corps members must ensure that 
their institutions and Courses are approved 
and accredited by Nigeria Universities 
Commission (NUC), National Board for 
Technical Education (NBTE) or Federal 
Ministry of Education (FME), otherwise they 
would not be mobilized..
Those who graduated from Institutions outside 
Nigeria, (Foreign-trained graduates), are to 
visit the NYSC portal, register and upload 
the following documents:
West African School Certificate(WASC) 
(with not less than 5 Credits at 2 
sittings) or its equivalent,
General Certificate of Education (GCE 
O’ Level) (with not less than 5 Credits 
at 2 sittings) or its equivalent,
NECO (with not less than 5 Credits at 2 
sittings) or its equivalent
First Degree or Higher National Diploma 
(HND) Certificate (Second Degree or 
Ph.D not necessary).
Transcript of the first Degree or HND.
International travelling Passport showing 
data page and date of departure.
It is the responsibility of the prospective 
corps members who studied in non-English 
speaking countries to get their Certificates 
and Transcripts translated into English 
language before uploading.
All graduates of Medicine and Pharmacy are 
expected to have their Certificates of 
Registration with Nigerian Medical and Dental 
Council of Nigeria (NMDCN) and Pharmacists 
Council of Nigeria (PCN) respectively. 
Payment receipts are not acceptable.
Unlike in the past, Foreign-trained graduates 
should not visit NYSC Headquarters, Abuja 
for verification of their documents. 
This 
exercise will now be done at the Orientation 
Camps. They should simply print their call-up 
letters on-line and report at the Orientation 
camps in their States of deployment, but 
should come along with the original documents 
they uploaded to the camp where they will be 
verified.
Anybody who presents any fake document will 
be demobilized and decamped.
Prospective corps members should ensure that 
it is their accurate passport size photograph 
that is captured during registration.
Ensure your face (eyes, nose, ears, 
mouth and jaw) is fully shown without 
bending 
Ensure the picture fills the frame and 
centralized.
Ensure the Photo background is white or 
off-white with no shadow.
On no account should prospective corps 
members register by PROXY. They should also 
remember the finger used for their biometric 
capturing as this will be used for data 
verification at the orientation camp. 
Those 
who cannot be verified with their biometric at 
the orientation camp will not be registered.
Only prospective corps members who want 
their call-up numbers sent to them through 
SMS and wish to PRINT their call-up letters 
on-line are expected to pay the sum of Three 
Thousand Naira (N3,000.00) (see NYSC Portal 
on how to make payment).
Prospective Corps members who do not want 
to pay the N3,000.00 have the option of 
going to their schools to collect their call-up 
numbers and call-up letters.
All prospective corps members who paid for 
the online registration during the 2014 Batch 
‘C’ Mobilisation but did not print their call-up 
letters online need not to pay again.
Married female prospective corps members 
should submit copies of their marriage 
Certificate, evidence of Change of name and 
their husband’s place of domicile including 
their call-up numbers to their schools or 
nearest NYSC Secretariats. Foreign-trained 
graduates should upload theirs during 
registration.
The orientation camps are not ideal for 
pregnant and nursing mothers. Prospective 
corps members in this category are therefore 
to note that they will not be accommodated.
Prospective corps members who have problems 
related to mobilization should go to the 
nearest NYSC Secretariats, see the 
Deployment and Relocation officer and lodge 
their complaints between 17th – 20th April, 
2015.
All Part-time graduates are also expected to 
register on-line, even though they qualify for 
Exclusion.
PLEASE NOTE THAT ONCE THE PORTAL IS 
CLOSED ON SATURDAY, 4TH APRIL 2015, 
THERE WILL BE NO FURTHER REGISTRATION.
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NYSC: Requirements For Mobilization Of Graduates 2015

This is to inform all prospective corps members, i.e. Nigerians who have graduated from Universities and Mono/Polytechnics both at home and abroad that the NYSC On-line registration portal will be ope…

15 Mar 2015

Your Marriage Is Dying

No suspense, I got the title of today�’s topic 
from a small story on Will Smith and Jada Pinkett 
Smith, American entertainers and celebrity 
couple. Will was once married, but divorced three 
years later. But he and Jada have been married 
for 18 years, an eternity by Hollywood standard. 
Okay, not only Hollywood; 18 years is a long time 
to sleep and wake up every day seeing the same 
face; it is a long time to stick with only one lover.
Even though Will and Jada �have built a 
reputation as being one of Hollywood's most 
unshakable couples, Will Smith recently admitted 
that within their highly talked about marriage, 
there have been times so rocky that their 
relationship has pretty much died at points.
However, instead of calling it quits, these two just 
find a new way to make things work...
“He told The Sun newspaper: �ewhatever you 
have is gonna die and you are gonna have to 
rebirth something new. You have to be willing to 
ride the waves. There�'s gonna be some flat 
days and some stormy days, and that has to be 
OK�.
�Additionally Jada� has previously said Smith is 
more than just a husband to her. She explained: 
�"We used to have all these rules, [but] as you 
go on in your relationship, you just get into a 
flow. Will, to me, encompasses everything. It�'s 
almost as if calling him �'my husband�' is too 
small of a word for what he means in my life�. I 
think I had a very stuck idea of what a husband 
looks like, what a wife should be. Once I broke all 
of that, a whole new world opened for me and my 
man, oh man! I got to see him in all his glory. And 
so that�f's what it�'s evolved into. And I�'m 
just ecstatic about it.�
When I meet people who claim that their marriage 
is all smooth sailing all the time, I shake my head 
in pity, because they are making complete fools 
of themselves and such marriages never grow 
because the foundation is fake and defective. 
How can a car being driven by two people 
simultaneously not have hiccups? You will get 
worked up sometimes, the relationship can hit an 
all-time low, you can get bored and tired of your 
spouse and feel like walking away from the 
marriage, your differences can get increasingly 
�girreconcilable�h, your spouse can get on your 
nerves with lifestyle changes and other changes 
like piling on the weight. The list just goes on and 
on.
Every marriage �dies at certain points; happily 
the parties involved can resurrect it.
Going through the brief story, a few tricks for 
refreshing marriages stick out: Their marriage is 
real, not an illusion. The relationship transcends 
husband and wife; they are friends, companions, 
partners, confidants and soul mates. 
There is 
trust and the wife respects her husband... That 
is why the word, husband, is too limiting and �too 
small�h for Jada to describe Will.
I have always believed that your spouse should 
mean the world to you; your spouse should be a 
light you put on the lamp stand, not hide under 
the table. You should celebrate your spouse. If 
he/she is not measuring up, sort out where the 
shortcomings are from and make amends.
The other lessons from their story are: they are 
no quitters. When the going gets tough, they find 
a way to get going. You should go into marriage 
with the mindset of �no retreat, no surrender.� 
That way, like a surfer, you will be prepared for 
waves that must inevitably come your way. The 
final lesson from the celebrity couple is that 
change is inevitable and we should brace up for 
it.
To keep your marriage alive and healthy, also note 
that it is like your body; you feed it with good 
food. Feed it with junk food and it will become 
unhealthy; starve it and over time it will die.
Nourish your marriage, tend it well and give it 
good grooming. Like your body too, these actions 
should not be once in a while, they should be 
regular.
Communication is the live-wire of a marriage. As 
long as couples are talking, the marriage is alive.
Stop talking and the marriage dies. 
Seek first to understand your spouse before 
seeking your spouse�'s understanding. It helps 
greatly to know where your spouse is coming from.
Also sexually active couples should keep a constant 
eye of their love life, its death sometimes 
precede the death of the marriage
Life is too short and marriage even shorter to 
waste on hating instead of loving, enduring 
instead of enjoying, denigrating instead of 
celebrating, grudging instead of forgiving, 
making war instead of making love.
[Marry right if you want to enjoy the true bliss 
that comes with matrimony].
By Francies Ewherido
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Your Marriage Is Dying

No suspense, I got the title of today�’s topic from a small story on Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith, American entertainers and celebrity couple. Will was once married, but divorced three years late…

15 Mar 2015

5 VERY POWERFUL REASONS WHY BUSYNESS IS NOT A GOOD BUSINESS

Running around like a headless chicken all day, normally doesn’t work. It hardly 
brings you the results you want in the long term. Sure, you can feel like a machine 
for a day, maybe for a week, or even a month.
We’ll see 5 very powerful reasons why being busy all day might not be good for 
business. Let’s get to them:
1. Know the difference.
Tell them apart: Being busy and doing business are 2 completely different animals. 
Being busy is widely overrated in our culture. So pay attention to the activities you 
do every day, because sometimes you just want to feel active, you just want to feel 
important by getting tons of things done, but it isn’t taking you to any place. Like 
running in a threadmill, you’re moving, but you’re going nowhere.
2. Growth and development aren’t the 
same thing.
A very simple definition says that growth is a physical process of becoming larger, 
whereas development is a process, a more qualitative state of evolution. 
Just to make it easy for you, a cemetery grows but doesn’t develop. And most of 
the times, it’s much better to do less, than to do more of the wrong things. Think if 
the next thing you’re gonna do will help you develop, or it’s just to help you grow.
3. You have no time to think.
One day I had a revelation, when I catched myself checking email like a possesed 
person. The revelation was “Strategy doesn’t come by email.” It basically means if 
you keep busy like a bee, you don’t have time to put things into perspective. And to 
focus on doing the right things. Sometimes you end up doing unnecessary stuff, or 
even worst, stuff that was better left undone. That take us straight to the next 
point.
4. You risk losing sight of the goal.
When you’re doing stuff all day, you risk losing the most important thing: 
Perspective. Perspective always keep in mind your priorities. If you feel that 
everything that reaches your to do list, or your email inbox has to be done, think 
again. Sometimes problem is worst: You feel you have to do them “Right now.” 
Focus only on the activities that take you closer to the most important goals. All 
others can wait… for a long time. Try it, and you’ll see the world keep going around.
5. You can’t adapt.
Animals adapt by instinct. Or they die. As humans, we’re not living a life or death 
situation everyday. That’s why we sort of lost the ability to adapt more quickly. 
Imagine that on top of that, you’re up to your head with things you need to do 
today… Adapting is an unachievable dream. Like the story of the boiling frog. If a 
frog is placed in boiling water, it will jump out, but if it is placed in cold water that 
is slowly heated, it will not perceive the danger and will be cooked to death
You probably are taking only short term decisions, and that could be a good thing… 
only for a while. But long term, you need time to think where you’re going.
Please, let us know what you think... 
You’re special, and we really want to know what you think. Please share your 
thoughts, so we can create a better community around here. Thanks!
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5 VERY POWERFUL REASONS WHY BUSYNESS IS NOT A GOOD BUSINESS

Running around like a headless chicken all day, normally doesn’t work. It hardly brings you the results you want in the long term. Sure, you can feel like a machine for a day, maybe for a week, or eve…

12 Mar 2015

5 URGENT THINGS TO THINK ABOUT WHENYOU HAVE A BURNING DESIRE TO BE BUSY

We do so many irrelevant things in our day to 
day, that’s overwhelming. Irrelevant to achieving 
our goals and to our happiness, that is. Actually 
these two should be the deciding factors 
whenever we come up with any “to-do list” we 
write.
Yesterday I was talking to my friend Tom about 
“Why people need to feel busy?” and it was a 
real concern we talked about at for more than 
an hour. It seems that to be somebody in the 
world today we have to feel like a macho alfas, 
or else. Yes, unfortunately that seems to apply 
to a growing number of women too. I was driving 
home after our conversation and I came up with 
these 5 tips that hopefully help you avoid the 
syndrome that’s killing our society.
1. Being busy isn’t the 
same as being 
productive.
Or doing something useful/worthwhile, for that 
matter. Sometimes I find myself seating at the 
computer wandering around news sites, checking 
email randomly, looking at my Facebook page to 
see “what’s going on”. But don’t confuse that 
with being productive or getting you closer to 
your goals. Whenever you catch yourself doing 
that, ask yourself the question: Why do I need 
to be busy? Or even worst, Why do I need to 
show others that I’m busy? Sometimes it’s a 
self-impossed pressure, but sometime we let the 
outside get to us. Identify the issue, and deal 
with it.
2. Ask yourself: Is this 
that important?
Important and urgent are sometimes mixed up 
together, when in reality they’re not. In our 
ability to tell them apart lies the key to great 
success and achievement, or not. 
Burn out shouldn’t be a badge of honor, but of 
stupidity. If it’s 8pm and you’re still pounding 
everyday, maybe something’s wrong with you 
and you should get help. It’s not unheard of 
people drawning themselves into work, work, work 
because they can’t face deeper personality or 
emotional issues. Maybe it’s time for an 
emotional checkup? There’s always going to be a 
reason to do “just one more thing” out of your 
to do list. Believe me, I’ve been there myself. 
And sometimes I still catch myself in that 
situation.
3. Why can’t it wait?
Why is that so urgent that if I don’t do it now, 
it’ll never get done? What’s the real urgency? 
Most of the times it’s just us making up the 
urgency. If it’s not a real life and death 
situation, it probably can wait. I came up with a 
motto for myself, in case it’s useful for you in 
these situations: “If it never had the ability to 
breathe, it’s not important.”
4. Did I have a minute 
to relax today?
Taking a break several times during the day will 
help you be much more productive. Your mind 
needs to decompress in order to be able to go 
back to overdrive. Sharpen your axe. It’s the 
time best invested. Relax your mind, unplug 
yourself from the world for 1 minute. Probably 
you started your day running around like a 
headless chicken. Take 1 minute, close your eyes, 
focus on your breathing…When you open your 
eyes again, the world should be moving slower.
5. Busyness doesn’t 
mean business.
Thinking is more difficult than doing. But if you 
put the effort on the thinking part, the doing 
part is not going to keep you running around all 
day. Most of the most successful people I know, 
aren’t the busiest ones. And I think that’s 
where it resides their secret. Having free time 
allows them to be more creative, thinking more 
strategically, and take outside views on what 
they’re doing help them improve how things are 
done. 
Over to you...
We know you’re special, and we really want to 
know what you think. Please share your 
thoughts, so we can create a better community 
around here. Thanks!
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5 URGENT THINGS TO THINK ABOUT WHENYOU HAVE A BURNING DESIRE TO BE BUSY

We do so many irrelevant things in our day to day, that’s overwhelming. Irrelevant to achieving our goals and to our happiness, that is. Actually these two should be the deciding factors whenever we c…

12 Mar 2015

37 CREATIVE WAYS TO AVOID BAD ENERGY IN YOUR LIFE

All of us face bad energy at one point or another. It keeps us from achieving some of our goals, it prevents us from making our dreams come true and sometimes impedes our emotional, professional and health progress. Here are some tips on how to cope with this problem, free our mind, and avoid negative energy in our environment: 
1. Be Determined.
Getting rid of bad energy is not easy, you have to be determined to change. However,  J.G. Goethe once said, “Everything is hard before it is easy.”, and this is a very true statement. In the beginning it is tough, but as you go on, you learn more and realize it is getting easier, and you are getting closer to your goal. 
2. Make The Decision.
Promise yourself you will do it, and you will persevere all the way. And remember: “Perseverance is the secret ingredient to accomplishment.” 
3. Stay Positive.
Bad energy is often directly related to negative beliefs. Try to neutralize such beliefs by procreating new, positive ones. For example, one of the common negative beliefs – ‘I am unsuccessful’. Many people will not think this is true, but it is unlikely that they will tell you so. Some of them will consider you as successful, but you will respectfully disagree with those. It is a matter of a perspective, and here is another one: if you are unsuccessful, there are many more people even less successful than yourself. And many of them would admire you. There are also those more successful than yourself – you should aim towards achieving the goals they achieved. So the new, improved version of the belief would be “Maybe I am unsuccessful, but I am more successful than some other people. If I managed to be more successful than them, I can be more successful than I am now!” Being positive is a perfect cure for bad energy, so you should stick to this attitude. 
4. Do Not Reinforce It.
We often do this by gathering false evidence to back up the belief, and by repeating it over and over again. If you keep reinforcing it, and repeating it to yourself, eventually it will become true. Here is a very true example: during my elementary school, I liked mathematics. I was very good at it and took part in several competitions. However, one day we got a new classmate who became my best friend. She was very bad at math, and she talked about it all the time. “It is so difficult, I cannot do it. It makes no sense to study this.” Eventually, my math grades started lowering. At one point, I was completely lost. I did not understand what was going on, why is my favorite subject suddenly so difficult and impossible to master? Then it hit me: her limiting beliefs became mine as I spent all of my free time with her. I stopped socializing with her, and then everything was fine. No negative influence, not negative suggestions. I tell this true story to everyone who does not recognize the bad energy arising out of limiting beliefs. 
5. Surround Yourself With Positive People.
Avoid people who emit negative energy. The previous example proves that this would be a great piece of advice. 
6. Avoid Criticizing Yourself.
Do not criticize yourself without changing the course of action in the new, better direction. Every time you do this, you are pacing backwards and will eventually end up in a middle of a vicious circle, which in consequence can be very difficult to leave. 
7. Try To Challenge Yourself.
Make a goal to achieve within a definite time frame and give your best to achieve it. Imagine it is the most important thing in your life, and invest your efforts and potential in order to achieve it. It is common knowledge among all of the personal development experts that if a person is sufficiently motivated, she/ he can achieve just about anything. There are no limits. None. It will blow away the bad energy in an instant and help you grow personally. 
8. Be Patient.
You have to work on this every day of every week of every month of your life. Many people think that forming a new habit allegedly takes 21 days – even though this is considered as a myth by some people. A myth or not, it does not really matter. The point is, you have to struggle every day, and you will not get to the point where it is locked in forever, and you don’t have to fight it any more. It is like food; 3-4 hours after you are done with your meal, you feel the need to eat again. You have to fight bad energy again and again. 
9. Be Playful.
When you start feeling bad energy, redirect your mind on positive things you did that day, or try to think about nice things that happened to you. Try to think of all the things you should be thankful for by comparing yourself to people who are disabled in any way, who are in much worse situation than yourself, and who would be happy to be blessed by the things you have, and you do not even notice. 
10. Change Your Attitude.
Focus on the things you want, instead of the things you do not want. Do not think about how not to fail, how not to make mistake or how not to gain weight. Think how to succeed, how to be accurate, and how to lose weight. 
11. Lower Your Expectations.
Have in mind that there are some things that can happen to prevent you from doing something you planned to do – and I am talking about the things out of your control. Be sure to give your best about the things that are in your control, but be prepared that something that is out of your control can come up. And that is not a failure. That is life. 
12. Do Not Let Your Past Define You.
There are maybe some events in the past that you are not proud of. Some reminders of these events bring a cloud of bad energy floating around you. Nevertheless, this does not mean that this event is likely to happen again, or that it will happen again. It means that you made a mistake, and as the Latins put it “Errare humanum est.” – “To err is human.” We learn from our mistakes, that is why we do not repeat them (or we should try not to repeat them). This is how we grow, each of the mistakes teaches us some new lesson that we can use in the future. 
13. Do Not Fear Change.
Fear of change is a powerful tool, and sometimes it can interfere with your decision to make some healthy changes in your life. It is usually reflected in your resistance towards the new idea. You can decrease this resistance by identifying it and making a plan to transform it. 
14. The More You Know, The Better.
Enhance your knowledge about people, their personalities and personal development. You will notice the correlation among these categories and it will enable you to find a path applicable to your situation. Soon enough, you will see that you are not the only one with this problem and this will help you realize there is a solution. 
15. Keep Positive Company.
Try to socialize with people who seem to have a strong personality because these people recognize the power of bad energy and hence avoid it at all costs. Bad energy related to negative beliefs can be contagious (as you can see from the tip No. 3), therefore positive people can have an enormous positive influence on your personal development. 
16. Start A New Hobby.
You often feel overwhelmed by bad energy when your mind is idle. Starting a new hobby will help you focus on something, and if you opt for a creative one that is a plus, because you will get an instant gratification after completing the project and you will see the product of your work. Bad energy will turn into a positive one in no time! 
17. Avoid Limitations.
When you are planning how to achieve your goal and make your dream come true, ignore all of the obstacles you are facing or you may face on the way. When you realize what is the best way to do it, go back and ‘attack’ the obstacles. While doing so, you will come to the conclusion that bad energy is just a matter of attitude, not a matter of fact. 
18. Avoid Negativity.
Turn the negative “what ifs” positive. Instead of “What if everything fells apart?”, try “What if something positive happens unexpectedly?”. The likelihood of each scenario is the same, so why not go for the positive one? 
19. Pay Attention To The Compliments.
Listen to the compliments of other people. When they say “you are smart”, or “you are hard-working”, do not dismiss it as irrelevant because they “do not know you”. There is some reason that makes them say that, and this can be a great way to neutralize bad energy that may hover around. 
20. Avoid Artificial Conclusions.    
Do not make your own conclusions and force your rules on life because you can be very wrong, and                often you are. For example, “If I cannot do this, I must be really stupid!” It will attract bad energy, and you don’t want to do that. 
21. Where Does It Come From?
Check the origin of bad energy – where does it originate from? When you relate them to their origin, it may help you understand why is it still around, and ultimately remove it from your mind and mood. 
22. Embrace Failure.
Failure is not the justification for the existence of bad energy. Failure is sometimes caused by some external factors and is considered as part of success. Therefore, it should relate to good energy instead of the bad one. 
23. Learn Something New.
Learn something new whenever you have the opportunity to do so, preferably every day. It can be empowering. 
24. Embrace Obliviousness.
Your obliviousness can be useful. Use it to forget negative things, failures, misunderstandings, problematic people, events or some problems. It can be a blessing. 
25. There Is Always A Reason.
Everything happens for a purpose. Having this in mind can make your struggle easier. 
26. The Golden Mean.
Do not underestimate yourself, but be careful not to overestimate yourself either. Each of the two extremes can be detrimental. 
27. Take Responsibility.
Do not play the victim. Take responsibility of your life. No bad energy is an excuse. 
28. Gold Can Not Be Pure And People Cannot Be Perfect.
No one is perfect. Neither are you. When you realize that bad energy is coming from there, you can easily make it disappear. 
29. No Matter How Successful You Become, Negative Comments Will Always Be Around.
Ignore the negative comments you get. Unless they are in form of a constructive critique. People like to talk and especially if they notice you are being irritated by their comments, they will keep doing it. Don’t let their comments throw you in a cloud of bad energy. 
30. Extremes Are No Good.
Do not think in extremes, life is not black and white. Instead of “I will certainly fail the exam.”, go   for  “I could do better, but alright.” 
31. Your Mistakes Are No Worse.
Do not consider your mistakes necessarily larger than mistakes of other people. At least consider them equally wrong. 
32. Do Not Forget The “Small Things"
Remember that small things make people happy. Do not ignore the “small things” because you have some negative thoughts or unpleasant people to deal with. 
33. Make New Friends.
Make friends with new people you meet. Try to learn about different perspectives and opinions. 
34. Be Constructive.
When you think about yourself, be constructive. Let this bad energy comes up just as a starting point of getting to a solution, and in no event let it be the major topic of your “inner dialogue”. 
35. Negativity is Bad Indeed.
A research conducted in UK showed that self blame can play the key role in some of the most common mental health problems. An additional reason to fight bad energy and bad thought in the right way! 
36. Let The Future Concern Stay In Future.
Do not worry in advance, because this is one of the ways to attract negative energy. Anticipating the worst possible scenario is a great recipe for attracting negative energy and quickly worsening your mood. 
37. Recognize The Power Of  Positivity.
Do not minimize positive energy arising out from positive things. It will not help you and, it is not fair towards yourself. If people would magnify positive things as they magnify negative things, the world would be a much better place!
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37 CREATIVE WAYS TO AVOID BAD ENERGY IN YOUR LIFE

All of us face bad energy at one point or another. It keeps us from achieving some of our goals, it prevents us from making our dreams come true and sometimes impedes our emotional, professional and h…

12 Mar 2015

5 CLEVER WAYS TO SAY “NO” THAT WON’T HURT

Successful people know that in order to excel at something you must develop a laser sharp focus. Is that the fun way of doing things? Not by a long shot. But it seems the only way to really master anything worth being the master at.
That’s why, really successful people have to say No to temptions. Temptations come in different forms and shapes: new ideas, new projects, new people with creative things in mind… But they understand that starting saying Yes to most of the things they get across, they’ll start losing their edge on the thing that made them unique, special, and really successful in the first place.
That’s why early on they have to learn how to say No. And deal with the consequences.
In our society saying No doesn’t have good press. You do want to help, that’s why you’re taking the time to reply properly.
1. Explain why
How sorry you’re. But you need to think the big picture, and when you do participate, you enter with both feet. But you’ve taken all your energy and commitment in the project you’re currently working on.
2. Smile is always the best lubricant.
You both know you’re delivering bad news. And that she or he might get or feel hurt. But your only goal is to have the other person understand your reasons. A smile is the shortest form of communication, and be emphatize
3. End your No with a question.
The energy doesn’t get stuck on your No. Do you think you can still do it, even if I’m not going to be able to help you, right? What would you do in my situation? Do you think it makes sense?
4. Keep it short.
Awful tasting medicine is best to take it in one seating, and get done with it. Same thing here.
5. The sooner the better.
As most of the bad news, the sooner is always the better. Maybe the other person is considering other options, so the better she or he knows, the better.If the “bad news” to the other party is not delivered in person, it’ll be less uncomfortable for you, but we suggest you still take the time to cover the 5 points mentioned above.
The floor is yours...
How did you handle a difficult situation where you had to say No? What consequences did you face? Have you learned how to handle it? Please do share with our community, we know we have lots to learn from each other. Being shy doesn’t help neither of us! We want to hear from you, so please leave us a comment
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5 CLEVER WAYS TO SAY “NO” THAT WON’T HURT

Successful people know that in order to excel at something you must develop a laser sharp focus. Is that the fun way of doing things? Not by a long shot. But it seems the only way to really master any…

12 Mar 2015

5 TIPS TO HELP YOU DEAL WITH NEGATIVE PEOPLE

Before we start it’d be useful to identify what we mean by a “negative environment.” Basically we’re talking about people, relatively close to us, whether in family ties, physical proximity, or that we see extremelly often, maybe because they’re co-workers, we’re roommates, go to school together, or just becuase we’re family
Without further due, here are the 5 Tips To Help You Deal With Negative People.
1) Identify them one by one.
In life you’ll be meeting people that drive you forward, inspire you, help you be the best that you can be. But also, unfortunately, you’ll meet people that for some reason take you down, slow you down, or just don’t help you move forward.Ideally you identify the negative people one by one. Yes, make a list with their names, and to the right you write one word that best describe what you don’t like about that person. For instance: Charly – Complainer, Mary – Gossiper, Alice – Whiner, etc.When you’re forced to put one word that describe each of the negative people you come across, it helps you be better prepared to deal with their negativity, becuase you’ll know what you’re dealing with beforehand.
2) Don’t give them all the attention you used to give them.
Remember, you don’t want these people taking so much of your time and energy. You have to think: it’s either them, or your medical studies (in the case of N.). They’ll find someone else, a more receptive ear to their complains, so they’ll start slowly going away. And that’s a good thing for you. If you’re thinking “I’d like to have them around, but just be less negative” you’re getting into fuzzy territory. You’re asking them to change. And maybe they want to, and maybe they can’t, or they just don’t want to…
3) Let them know you want more positivity in your life.
Everyone assumes that everyone remains the same. But that’s hardly ever the case. We, as human being, keep changing. You could share with your closest people, especially the people you’ve identified as having a negative attitude, that you’re changing. That you want something better, more positive for your life.Don’t worry, you don’t have to be blunt. You could drop hints in your conversations with them, such as “You know, I took a webinar last week that I really liked. The speaker talked about the power of positive thinking, positive messages and the like that really helped me a lot. You should take it too.” Yeah, I know, the last comment maybe could be avoided, but I couldn’t help myself!If you don’t want to say anything, you could print some positive signs and place them around the house or whatever you see these people. For instance “A positive mind gets positive results.” or “If you don’t like what you’re getting, change what you’re doing.” There are really tons of quotes you could find online. Go for the ones that most resonate with you.
4) Shield your mind (and your heart).
When you see negative people coming your way, quickly identify what’s his or her main negative thing. For instance, envy. Or complainer. Next time you’re around that person you’ll be a bit more “prepared” internally to deal with the things that bother you. Eventually you could explore why is it that envy, for instance, bothers you so much. Maybe you could find things about yourself and envy that you don’t like. Just saying…You could even try to share your thoughts with that person about envy, or maybe you could tell your truth openly… -good luck with that. Remember, when talking about someone’s flaws (according to you) you can go the polite way, or the harsh way. Being tactful is recommended.
5) Fight tooth and nail.
Remember what’s at stake here: Your life, your happiness. Fight tooth and nail to defend that. And a negative environment, sooner or later gets to you, whether you realize it or not. You’ll know it when it’s really late, when you start believing that the world is a mean and nasty place. Yeah, I know, it can be sometimes. But knowing about it, is not the same as living in that world all the time.You can be alert sometimes, but is really tough (and draining) to be alert all the time to sutil negative message other people keep sharing. Get away from those people. Run away, if possible. If you can’t actually run away physically from those people, at least travel with your mind. Be physically present, but mentally live in your positive world.Some people could say hiding away is not a mature way of solving the issue. I agree. But when the issue can’t be solved, I’m aiming at protecting you from the “disease” of negative people.Hey, I didn’t say it was going to be easy! Good luck. Really. The world needs more positive people like yourself. We’re going to be here for you. Never forget that. Have an Inspowered day!
Bonus. Praise them.
And do it often. It disarms them. It’s hard for negative people to accept an honest and sincere compliment. They’ll naturally try to turn your positive comment down. Like you go: “nice sweater, and the color matches your eyes”… and they go: “It better be! You don’t want to know how much I payed for it. Overpaid I should say.” Let’s give them something, it’s a natural born talent to turn a positive praise into a very negative remark! (I’m being sarcastic. Why in the world would you want THAT talent, huh?).Thanks Joelle for emailing me with this suggestion 
What would YOU add? Please leave your comments below.
Please share your thoughts about dealing with negative environments. Any feedback from your personal experience? We’d love to know. Please leave a comment below. Thanks
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5 TIPS TO HELP YOU DEAL WITH NEGATIVE PEOPLE

Before we start it’d be useful to identify what we mean by a “negative environment.” Basically we’re talking about people, relatively close to us, whether in family ties, physical proximity, or that w…

11 Mar 2015

3 POWERFUL REASONS WHY IT’S POSSIBLE TO ACHIEVE YOUR DREAMS

We all have dreams, or so I like to believe. Don’t you have one, a dear goal, something you truly would love for your life? It varies from people to people, some are more materialistic, some are more altruistic. Some are more concrete, like a new car for instance. Some dreams are more intangible, such as world peace.Mine? 
My dreams are more in the latter category. I believe every human being has the right to give a shot at their dreams. I’d love to help millions of people around the world to realize the right to make their dreams come true. Basically, because that’ll make the world a far better place for the generations to come.
Here you’ll find just 3 of the many reasons of why it’s possible for you to achieve your dreams.
1. You deserve it
Being born in itself is a magic of nature, a dream of two people. As such, life brings joyful opportunities. As a human being you’re worthy of anything. Don’t believe the naysayers who make you believe you can’t do it. You deserve to make it happen, because you’re a human being, and that’s enough.
2. If you can dream it, you can achieve it
Zig Ziglar put it best when he said that. If you have the ability to envision something, it’s a fact you have the strenght it takes to make it happen. The universe has to be really perverse to give you the possibility of dreaming, but not achieving it, don’t you think? And I believe the universe is only positive things.
3. No one else can dream your dream
We’re all unique. There are not two human beings alike in the world. And as such, your dreams are unique too. Rest assured that if you were born, the world needs you walking the path of your dreams. There’s only one person who can stop you from achieving it, and that’s yourself.You have one opportunity to make your dream a reality. And it’s called Today.If you can look up, you can get up. If you can get up, you can walk. If you can walk, you can run. If you can run, then, you’re unstoppable. Go, run, run for your dream. No one will stop you.
Now it’s your turn...
Do you think dreams can be achieved? What about your dreams? Please share, I’d like to know, and I’m sure most of the people in our Inspower community would like it too!
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3 POWERFUL REASONS WHY IT’S POSSIBLE TO ACHIEVE YOUR DREAMS

We all have dreams, or so I like to believe. Don’t you have one, a dear goal, something you truly would love for your life? It varies from people to people, some are more materialistic, some are more …

11 Mar 2015

5 EASY THINGS TO DO WHEN YOU’RE REALLY SCARED TO TRY SOMETHING NEW

Being scared when facing something new, is 
totally understandable. Here you’ll find 5 tips 
that’ll help you dealing with the feelings that 
might arise when you’re facing trying something 
new in your life.
1. Don’t care about 
what others will say.
Your own opinion is what really counts. I 
understand we all take other people’s opinions 
seriously. But when trying something new, you 
have to trust your gut. It’s you who know what’s 
best for you. There’s a clever remark by Henry 
Ford. He said: “If I’d ask people what did they 
want, they’ve replied faster horses.”
2. Stop considering 
other alternatives.
You now have one goal in mind. And you picked 
that one for a reason. The moment you picked 
that one, all the others are gone for good. 
Don’t bring them back, ever. Do like Hernan 
Cortes, and burn the ships!
3. Don’t doubt 
yourself.
You know you can do it. You already have 
eveyrthing necessary to achieve it. You’re gonna 
make it. Remember: The person you see in the 
mirror everyday could be your worst enemy. Or 
your best ally. It’s you who make the call.
4. Don’t look back.
Just keep hustling. Looking back will only bring 
you doubts, and maybe regrets. Nothing has to 
distract you from your goal. The key to success 
is focus. The only way you look is forward. That’s 
where you want to go.
5. Don’t overthink it.
Just do it. Overthinking kills more dreams than 
failure ever will! I like to say: “A mile of worries 
won’t get you as far as one inch of action.” And 
you can’t overthink anything when you’re really 
busy doing.
Bonus #1. If you don’t 
try, you’ll never know.
Did you know that people regret not doing the 
thing they wanted to do, than doing it wrong, or 
even failing at achieving it? Pretty 
powerful realization.
Bonus #2. Accept the 
worst case scenario 
fully.
Take the power out of it by accepting it. Expect 
good things to come. Focus on what it will feel 
like once you’ve accomplished what you want. 
Then, work backwards. What are the steps you 
need to take in order to achieve this 
experience? Break them down into micro-steps. 
Do one each day. Even if the starting steps 
involve breaking down the bigger steps, you will 
feel better about moving forward actively. 
Lastly, tell supportive people your plans. The 
more other people know about your plans, the 
more realistic they become!
This Bonus #2 was suggested by Heather 
Schwartz. So, if you want to leave your 
comments, we might include them as bonuses! 
Don’t be shy.
What have I missed? 
Please do tell!
I know there’ll be many more I’m missing, that’s 
whey I’m counting on you to bring them up! 
Please leave your comment below. Thanks.
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhD66XbGuI313scXvzMBi7Y1bxd_fPaRMDL5mPKU-rDPojLhMNz4yc6DKuEt8d4d4SPMYXKPkjIXXTgCzcpvLcHxowmCHTefEXTtaZ9dDg4qQ8rXOypEYOhYwDKGw6qUAbJXnsnou0GwnDU/s1600/5022057355_864a8eaf9e_z.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"> <img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhD66XbGuI313scXvzMBi7Y1bxd_fPaRMDL5mPKU-rDPojLhMNz4yc6DKuEt8d4d4SPMYXKPkjIXXTgCzcpvLcHxowmCHTefEXTtaZ9dDg4qQ8rXOypEYOhYwDKGw6qUAbJXnsnou0GwnDU/s640/5022057355_864a8eaf9e_z.jpg"> </a> </div>

5 EASY THINGS TO DO WHEN YOU’RE REALLY SCARED TO TRY SOMETHING NEW

Being scared when facing something new, is totally understandable. Here you’ll find 5 tips that’ll help you dealing with the feelings that might arise when you’re facing trying something new in your l…

11 Mar 2015

25 SIGNS THAT YOUR FRIENDS ARE NOT YOUR FRIENDS

Friends are definitely a big part of our being 
and our social lives. As humans we need friends, 
we need people to share feelings, have 
conversations with them, and just construct our 
social networks. Friends are there for us when 
we need them and good friends are there for us 
all the time and bring the best out of us. On 
the other side, sometimes you consider someone 
a friend and they stay your friend for a while, 
but then one incident happens and gets you to 
the conclusion that maybe they are not your 
friends. Maybe they were just taking advantage 
of you or a service you provided but once their 
benefit stopped, they revealed their true colors. 
Therefore, it is extremely important to choose 
your friends and not just choose someone 
because they provide you a certain service. 
Friends should be chosen based on their 
personality and because they bring the best out 
of you when you are with them. 
You may have a lot of friends and a large 
network, but the true, working network is 
defined by your true friends. It is really hard to 
find good, supportive friends that are willing to 
befriend you for who you are and your 
personality. That’s why there certain things to 
look for in a person to ensure that he is worthy 
of befriending. In addition, it is always wise to 
choose friends that are lively, that will lift you 
up and not bring you down, and who appreciate 
you. Now, Let’s have a look at some of the signs 
that friends are not actually our friends. 
1. Backbiting
Backbiting is the act of speaking of someone in 
their absence. True friends do not wait until you 
leave the room so that they spit out degrading 
words about you and how bad you are and 
exaggerate your personality in a bad way. This is 
one potential sign that that your so-called 
friend is not really your friend. 
2. Disregard
Ever been in a situation let us say in university 
where you knew this person as your friend and 
you studied together a certain course and did 
all the assignments and projects together. Then 
later you actually find out after the course is 
over that this person no longer stays in touch 
with you and just disregards any phone calls 
from you. This is a big shocker but it happens in 
life. People like is are advantage takers; they 
just are your friends to be able to study with 
you, but after all that is done it is like they 
never knew you. 
3. Not Wishing You 
The Best
True friends will always wish you the best in 
your work, home, family, and life in general. 
This is because true friends feel happy and 
accomplished when you achieve a milestone or 
reach a goal. 
4. Setting You Up
This does not happen a lot but could happen 
occasionally. It is definitely frustrating and 
heart breaking when you find out that the 
person that set you up is an old friend. If this 
ever happens, it definitely reflects that that 
person is not a true friend for sure. 
5. Demotivating/ 
Discouraging You
Discouraging a friend from carrying out a task 
that may be harmful or unbeneficial could be 
something positive. However, there are other 
cases when you find that a friend or companion 
is demotivating you or discouraging you from 
doing something helpful and useful in fear of 
you succeeding and getting ahead of them. This 
definitely indicates that they do not want the 
best for you and thus do not qualify as friends. 
6. Not Missing You
Another red flag when it comes to friendship is 
not missing you. This seems like something silly 
and not given much attention but there is more 
meaning to it than it seems. True friends will 
wait until you come back if you go for a trip 
and will make the effort to pass by and welcome 
you back home. 
7. Not Happy To See 
You
Friends usually are happy to see each other all 
the time. On the contrary, fake friends will just 
be happy to see a “friend” when they need help 
with something or when there is some benefit on 
the line. After all the work is done and they do 
not need any more help… these phony friends 
will not care to see you or may not be happy to 
see all the time. 
8. Taking Advantage
This is one of the biggest reasons or calls for 
fake friends. Taking advantage is such a bad 
thing but yet is used by many people as a 
motive to become friends with others. This can 
be spotted and noticed if a person contacts his 
friends just when in need for a favor while 
ignoring them when not in need. 
9. Using Excuses To 
Avoid You
Ever been in a situation where you tried to 
contact a friend but would not answer your calls 
and then when ask why he did not answer he will 
give you an excuse? At first, you consider that 
the excuse might be true and that he could be 
busy and unable to answer your calls. However, 
time after time with the excuses varying, you 
feel like there is something wrong and go along 
with your day. You end up meeting them 
unexpectedly and notice that they are out 
chilling with others but they have told you that 
they were busy with work. Suddenly you feel 
misery and that you are not important to them. 
Now, you made sure that they were just avoiding 
you all along by providing false excuses. 
10. Blaming You
Friends are meant to protect each other and 
depending on the degree of friendship, cover up 
for each other. One thing to take notice of is if 
your friend is blaming everything on you 
whenever you guys fall in trouble even though 
you might be innocent. Other than lying, your 
friend is putting your friendship in danger. 
11. Understanding
True friends are those who understand you and 
what you are doing. They will never make you 
feel bad because you prefer work over play or 
over hanging out with them. A sketchy friend 
will make you feel terrible because you passed on 
an invitation because you have a more important 
thing. 
12. Pretending
Pretending to be someone’s friend is a common 
trick that individuals use to try to derive a 
benefit from someone else. The problem with this 
is that some people are actually good actors and 
it is really hard to tell if they are trying to get 
to know you as a friend or just interested in a 
skill you have. However, once friends it is easier 
to discover whether they are real friends or not 
by checking whether or not they like to hang out 
with you or communicate outside the studying 
environment or whatever. 
13. Cannot Tell Them
A Secret 
There are people we are around that we do not 
feel comfortable telling secrets too. I mean 
secrets are a big detail of our life that is 
important to us and usually once exposed can 
lead to potential issues and problems. If you 
cannot tell a friend a secret then he is not 
really a friend. 
14. Family Details
This is not always the case but with friends you 
usually share details of family and ask about 
their families just as they ask about yours. This 
comes from the fact that friends usually wish 
you the best and care about you and so knowing 
that family is a big part of us, they ask about 
your family to make sure everything is going 
well. 
15. You Only See Them
In Group Settings 
If we all considered whoever we saw in group 
gatherings or meetings a friend, we would all 
have infinite friends. Individuals you do not 
spend time with one on one or in a small group 
would not be considered friends. 
16. They Forget
Important Dates 
Friends are meant to remember important dates 
including your birthday, graduation, wedding, 
and so on. This is because these dates define us 
and are a huge part of our lives just like a true 
friend. Therefore, remembering such dates adds 
more value to a friendship. A casual or fake 
friend would not bother remembering such 
dates. 
17. No One Else 
Available
One can get really excited if they receive a call 
from a friend whom they enjoy their company on 
a weekend, right? What if you discovered or get 
an impression that your so-called friend is 
actually calling because no else is free so you 
are like his back-up plan? That could turn all 
the excitement immediately into distress and 
aggravation. 
18. Cannot Be Yourself 
Around Them
This is a really important point. Do you feel like 
you are comfortable to be yourself around your 
friend(s)? Are you able to show your true colors 
and behave as you wish? Some people find it 
difficult to be themselves around others and so 
in this case, those people are not really 
considered friends. 
19. You Are Doing All 
The Effort
Many relationships nowadays are one-sided 
relationships and just don’t work. One party is 
putting in all the effort while the other cannot 
be bothered or is just not attempting to make 
the relationship work. This could also apply to 
friendship and can often lead to the loss or 
destruction of a friendship. 
20. Giving Up On You
True friendship is special and comes in a very 
embellished and decorated package. Ever had a 
friend that even when you have given up on 
yourself during a really bad situation, they still 
never gave up on you and are trying their best 
to get you back on your feet? If yes, then this 
is a friend to keep for life. Even though friends 
are not obliged to correct your mistakes, 
especially when you feel there is no solution, a 
true friend will put in that effort to save you. 
21. Awkward Silences
During conversations between friends there 
could end up being a long pause or silence that is 
known as “awkward silence”. There are silences 
but if you ever feel like you cannot sit down and 
be quiet, feel compelled to fill in that silence, 
then this could be a sign that the person you 
are talking to is not actually a friend.
22. Apologizing For 
Not Being Able To Pick 
You UP
True friends are always there for each other. 
They usually agree on picking each other up or 
dropping each other off at the airport for 
example, no matter what the time is. I’m sure 
at least some of us experienced that where a 
friend would drop you off at an airport at times 
like 5 am.
23. Not Borrowing 
From Each Other
Another benefit that comes about from good 
friendship is the ability to borrow and provide 
help to each other. I’m talking about borrowing 
things that normal people do not share with each 
other. Examples of these include cars, expensive 
electronic appliances, or even items of clothing.
24. Fixing Friendship 
Issues
Again, this is one of the good things about true 
friendships, but is missing in fake friendships. 
True friends tend to always try to resolve any 
issues that arise between each other instead of 
worsening everything. Moreover, some friends 
actually accept criticism even though they might 
not be the party that committed the mistake or 
started the argument.
25. Pointing Out Areas 
of Improvement
Pointing out areas of improvement is one 
important factor when it comes to self- 
development and improvement. Casual friends 
who are not true friends will not try to point 
out something wrong you are doing and try to 
advise you to correct it.
26. Doing Favors
Expanding on the idea that a friend should be 
there for you all the time, friends should be 
open for favors. So you want a friend you can 
depend on, that can help out when you need the 
help. At the same time, you need to be there 
for them too. One important thing for this 
buddy system to work is to not keep track of 
the number of favors you do for each other, 
because if your friend counts the favors he 
does, he might not be a true friend. This is 
because remembering favors could lead to the 
rise of issues and complaining about one does not 
do as many favors as the others and the 
friendship just takes a great fall!
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25 SIGNS THAT YOUR FRIENDS ARE NOT YOUR FRIENDS

Friends are definitely a big part of our being and our social lives. As humans we need friends, we need people to share feelings, have conversations with them, and just construct our social networks. …

11 Mar 2015

PASSOVER INSTITUTED.

“And HaShem spoke unto Moses and Aaron in the land of Egypt, saying: 'This month 
shall be unto you the beginning of months; it shall be the first month of the year to 
you.” Exodus 12:1&2. 
Q: This Month. What month? 
A: The month is Nissan. Also called Abib.
“Draw out, and take you lambs according to your families, and kill the passover lamb. 
And ye shall take a bunch of hyssop, and dip it in the blood that is in the basin, and 
strike the lintel and the two side-posts with the blood that is in the basin; and none of 
you shall go out of the door of his house until the morning. For HaShem will pass 
through to smite the Egyptians; and when He seeth the blood upon the lintel, and on 
the two side-posts, HaShem will pass over the door, and will not suffer the destroyer 
to come in unto your houses to smite you. And ye shall observe this thing for an 
ordinance to thee and to thy sons for ever.” Exodus 12:21-24. 
Q: What ordinance? 
A: The ordinance is Passover.
“And thou shalt tell thy son in that day, saying: It is because of that which HaShem 
did for me when I came forth out of Egypt. And it shall be for a sign unto thee upon 
thy hand, and for a memorial between thine eyes, that the law of HaShem may be in 
thy mouth; for with a strong hand hath HaShem brought thee out of Egypt. Thou shalt 
therefore keep this ordinance in its season from year to year.” Exodus 13:8-10. 
Q: What shall we tell our son in that day? 
A: The Story of Exodus! How HaShem personally, with a mighty hand liberated our 
fathers from the bondage of Egypt. As it is written: “And it shall be when thy son 
asketh thee in time to come, saying: What is this? that thou shalt say unto him: By 
strength of hand HaShem brought us out from Egypt, from the house of bondage; and 
it came to pass, when Pharaoh would hardly let us go that HaShem slew all the 
firstborn in the land of Egypt, both the first-born of man, and the first-born of 
beast; therefore I sacrifice to HaShem all that openeth the womb, being males; but all 
the first-born of my sons I redeem. And it shall be for a sign upon thy hand, and for 
frontlets between thine eyes; for by strength of hand HaShem brought us forth out 
of Egypt.” 
Exodus 13:14-16.
Israel is indeed redeemed by God as His inheritance for ever. And He has not dealt so 
with any other nation. In the words of Moses our teacher: 
“For ask now of the days past, which were before thee, since the day that God 
created man upon the earth, and from the one end of heaven unto the other, whether 
there hath been any such thing as this great thing is, or hath been heard like it? Did 
ever a people hear the voice of God speaking out of the midst of the fire, as thou 
hast heard, and live? Or hath God assayed to go and take Him a nation from the 
midst of another nation, by trials, by signs, and by wonders, and by war, and by a 
mighty hand, and by an outstretched arm, and by great terrors, according to all that 
HaShem your God did for you in Egypt before thine eyes? Unto thee it was shown, 
that thou mightiest know that HaShem, He is God; there is none else beside Him. Out 
of heaven He made thee to hear His voice, that He might instruct thee; and upon 
earth He made thee to see His great fire; and thou didst hear His words out of the 
midst of the fire. And because He loved thy fathers, and chose their seed after them, 
and brought thee out with His presence, with His great power, out of Egypt, to drive 
out nations from before thee greater and mightier than thou, to bring thee in, to 
give thee their land for an inheritance, as it is this day;” Deuteronomy 4:31-38. 
Amen.
May the season of our redemption bring us true libration from all oppression! 
Shalom!
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PASSOVER INSTITUTED.

“And HaShem spoke unto Moses and Aaron in the land of Egypt, saying: 'This month shall be unto you the beginning of months; it shall be the first month of the year to you.” Exodus 12:1&2. Q: This Mont…

10 Mar 2015

The Undergraduate Nna anyi- A must Read For Students

The first time this was mentioned to 
some university students, they reeled 
out laughter at that coinage because 
some experienced and could attest to 
it. In university campuses across 
Nigeria, it is a common phenomenon 
for male students to rent off-campus 
apartments just for comfort and “a bit 
of privacy” as one of my classmates 
would say. Living in those houses 
alone is now a thing of the past as 
some students wants to experiment 
marital life before leaving campus 
and getting married proper. This led 
to the term “undergraduate nna anyi ” 
which represents a male student 
living in his rented apartment with 
his girlfriend. This “couple life” as it 
is being referred to in some schools 
makes the male student assume the 
role of a husband and his girlfriend- 
the wife. This relationship has every 
attribute of a real marriage except 
that it must be devoid of pregnancy 
and the consent of the parents of 
both parties. The “undergraduate nna 
anyi” who relies on his parents for 
money, becomes the breadwinner as 
he provides money for food, sight- 
seeing during weekends and most 
often provides the female student 
with money for her upkeep. The 
female student on the other hand 
cooks, cleans up the house and 
satisfies her man’s sexual appetite. In 
some of these relationships, the 
female student’s accommodation fee 
is used for household expenses or in 
some cases, the proud-but-hungry 
boyfriend asks the girlfriend to look 
good with it (i.e. buy clothes and 
beauty accessories). This two are 
known by neighbors and people 
living around as they are seen going 
to and coming back from school 
together almost every day. For some, 
the only time they remember that 
they are actually students is when 
examinations come knocking as they 
spend a better part of the semester 
practicing family life. It is not 
uncommon to find most 
“undergraduate nna anyi’s” sleeping 
during lectures due to the vigils they 
keep at night. These male students 
tell every form of lies to their parents 
in other to get money for themselves 
and the demanding relationship and 
the female student doesn’t have this 
knowledge. At times of lack, maybe 
when the money they expect is not 
forthcoming or when they must have 
exhausted their allowances before 
time, these male students are seen 
running from one friend to another 
trying to borrow money just to please 
their girlfriends because as we all 
know, women have affinity for cash. 
The relationship as enjoyable as it 
seems from the outside, has dire 
consequences as some results in 
pregnancy which in turn leads to one 
or the two students dropping out of 
school or in more serious but rare 
cases death of either the boy or girl 
as a result of sexual marathons as 
had been witnessed in some 
university campuses. Most often, the 
male student squanders their school 
fees in the process which kicks off 
their problems in school as some are 
seen spending 6, 7 or more years for 
a 4year academic program. My advice 
to those who are thinking of 
engaging in the so called couple life 
is this: “not all that glitters is gold”. 
And for those who are already in it 
and think they are enjoying it- “the 
end justifies the means.
THIS ARTICLE WAS WRITTEN BY 
VICTOR IKEJI, ( A final year student 
in UNN)
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The Undergraduate Nna anyi- A must Read For Students

The first time this was mentioned to some university students, they reeled out laughter at that coinage because some experienced and could attest to it. In university campuses across Nigeria, it is a …

08 Mar 2015

Ladies Only: 5 Sure Ways To Know A Guy Likes You

Sometimes, men are impossible to figure out. 
Unless they directly hit on you, it’s a nightmare 
trying to know for sure if they’re interested. 
Ever thought that your best guy friend held your 
gaze a bit too long or went out of his way to spend 
time with you? 
Have you ever wondered if his feelings run deeper 
than friendship? 
Dating coach, Kezia Noble reveals how to spot 
those tell-tale signs that he may be after 
something more than just platonic friendship.
1. You like: There is a huge difference between being a concerned friend who can put 
forward a strong case as to why they feel you need to be cautious about a certain 
guy, and a friend who sneers and makes fun of every guy who shows any interest in 
you. Is he too keen to always ensure that you remain single? It’s a classic sign he 
want you for himself.
2. He wants to spend a lot of time with you: Men like to spend time with their female 
friends, but they usually don’t like spending time doing girlie things with them like 
shopping for hours or watching chick flicks on a Saturday night. If you notice that 
he jumps at the chance to see you regardless of how many shops you drag him into 
and how many chick flicks he has to tolerate, then beware. Unless he’s secretly 
gay, of course!
3. He doesn’t show any interest in your female friends: Most guys endlessly nag their 
female friends for introductions to their other friends, always asking them to ‘put 
in a good word’ on their behalf – and casually dropping by when you are hanging 
with your girls. However, if your male friend prefers to spend time with you alone 
rather than in the company of your beautiful single girlfriends, he probably has 
tunnel vision for you.
4. He tells you what you want to hear too much: We all like to flatter our friends and 
give them little boosts of confidence here and there, but most men traditionally 
don’t always ‘get’ or appreciate the same tings women do. If he seems to LOVE 
everything you do and wear and say, then infatuation can be to blame here.
5. He’s always the first to comment and like your social media updates: This is a clear 
indication to others that you and he are closer to each other than other people. 
Monitor his comments too. Do they suggest that something is going on between you 
that clearly is not the case? Does he respond to your updates more than the 
updates of his other friends? The answers to these questions can reveal a lot.
Of course, at the end of all of this, you still have to decide whether you return his 
interest.
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuYV6R_uiobKUNFF5WtpC1EhEaXmDBXX4ZLcbneJmO_1r00dLq5dFLBdgDEdguC856M1nd1jaq1m2rxBW3D6r7KixP3-ZcOW2KYPAs1oe-4jRe6EFOHRsBueyseRk5zQ_WBHWRLuZXnDzK/s1600/networking1_3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"> <img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuYV6R_uiobKUNFF5WtpC1EhEaXmDBXX4ZLcbneJmO_1r00dLq5dFLBdgDEdguC856M1nd1jaq1m2rxBW3D6r7KixP3-ZcOW2KYPAs1oe-4jRe6EFOHRsBueyseRk5zQ_WBHWRLuZXnDzK/s640/networking1_3.jpg"> </a> </div>

Ladies Only: 5 Sure Ways To Know A Guy Likes You

Sometimes, men are impossible to figure out. Unless they directly hit on you, it’s a nightmare trying to know for sure if they’re interested. Ever thought that your best guy friend held your gaze a bi…

05 Mar 2015

Couples Only: 9 Health Benefits Of Having S.eX Regularly… [18+Only]

It can also help you sleep better at night and wake up healthier in the morning. 
Studies also show that those who have an active se x live longer and may even have 
more successful careers. 
Se x is fun and feels incredible — that alone is plenty reason to have more of it. But 
if you need additional incentive, it has an incredible array of benefits to our health 
and well-being. 
Aside from giving you a youthful glow, sex is also a great way to stay flexible and 
burn calories. 
It can also help you sleep better at night and wake up healthier in the morning. 
Studies also show that those who have an active sex live longer and may even have 
more successful careers. 
Below are nine additional health benefits of regular se x:
1. It boosts immunity : “Research suggests that those who have had sex recently have 
higher levels of immunoglobulin A, an antibody that can help ward off common cold 
and flu symptoms,” says Astroglide’s Resident Sexologist, Dr. Jess.
2. You’ll live longer: Improved longevity, balanced hormones and lower stress levels. 
“These benefits are associated with the good night’s sleep that often follows a romp 
in the hay owing to the increase in oxytocin levels!” says Dr. Jess.
3. Couples who are in a happy relationship have a decreased risk of cardiovascular 
disease, higher survival rates after serious surgeries and greater longevity owing to 
healthier eating habits, stronger social networks and an increased likelihood of 
seeking medical care, says Dr. Jess.
4. Pain relief: Se x can be used as a pain reliever especially during orga sm when 
levels of oxytocin get exponentially elevated, says John W. Beiter, Ph.D., CST, 
Licensed Psychologist and AASECT Certified Se x Therapist. So, stop using those 
headaches as an excuse not to play! 
5. Anti-aging : “Studies have shown that couples having more se x can look seven 
years younger!” says love and se x coach Kim Anami. 
6. Exercise : According to psychologist and se x therapist Dr. Estella Sneider, by 
having se x at least three times per week it helps burn calories and we get the 
benefit of using more than 500 muscles! 
7. It’s great for your career: “Dr. Helen Fisher, an anthropologist and biologist, 
states that people who have se x regularly are more successful at work,” says 
Sneider. According to her, sex helps trusting oneself and increases self–esteem. 
8. Beauty treatment: Regular se x increases estrogen production, which makes your 
hair shiny and your skin smooth. “The pheromones you release act as a natural 
perfume, so more people are attracted to you!” adds Anami. 
9. Stress relief: The oxytocin released at orgas m wipes out cortisol, which is the 
major stress hormone, says Anami.
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiY0iqaodQfN0uas5E4horjZpqFdTOKNO62hdTZ8hN-W6FOueRlEYie0M-u6ZaaJsgA5zSdMtbeY2oNIRtHJfV9-KmgRtAg2gNs1nIucmbbwHkbVFLXpoUTN9ZQMqKEFewEArW49OBwPjQh/s1600/SEX-NL.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"> <img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiY0iqaodQfN0uas5E4horjZpqFdTOKNO62hdTZ8hN-W6FOueRlEYie0M-u6ZaaJsgA5zSdMtbeY2oNIRtHJfV9-KmgRtAg2gNs1nIucmbbwHkbVFLXpoUTN9ZQMqKEFewEArW49OBwPjQh/s640/SEX-NL.jpg"> </a> </div>

Couples Only: 9 Health Benefits Of Having S.eX Regularly… [18+Only]

It can also help you sleep better at night and wake up healthier in the morning. Studies also show that those who have an active se x live longer and may even have more successful careers. Se x is fun…

05 Mar 2015

8 Guys You Must Never, Under Any Circumstances, Fall In Love With

1. The one who messages you once a year to say 
something incredible. 
Every so often, you’ll wake up to a text or a 
Facebook message from him, something about how 
he thought of you last night, or how he wants to 
see you, or when are you going to be in his city? 
It will fill you with a sudden whoosh of excitement 
and hope. But no matter how carefully you’ll try 
to reply to his messages — to seem casually 
interested, but not like you’re invested in his 
sudden attention — he’ll always fade away again, 
and you’ll somehow be left feeling desperate, 
even if he’s the one who reached out to you. 
You’ll delete his number from your phone to 
prevent yourself from drunk texting him, but 
you’ll still look at his profile every now and again.
2. The one who doesn’t like your friends. 
He’ll hang out with them from time to time, 
because to not see them would be unreasonable, 
but he 
won’t like it. He’ll pout and text a lot and demand 
your attention, and then when the two of you are 
walking home, he’ll say nasty things about them. 
One time your friend will come over late at night, 
crying because she just got some very, very bad 
news, and the two of you will sit on your couch, 
drinking wine and talking until 3 AM. You’ll tell 
him about it the next day, and he’ll make an 
offhand comment about how your friends are “so 
fucking dramatic.”
3. The one with the interesting tattoos, who 
makes you say “yes.” 
One day you’ll be standing outside of a house 
party, drinking a beer and talking to people you 
don’t really know. He’ll be sitting next to you on a 
cooler, wearing a frayed, deep-cut t shirt that 
shows off all of his interesting tattoos — black 
lines, strange symbols, words written too small to 
read from your distance — and rolling a small 
cigarette on an open pack of Drum. You’ll look 
down at him for a second too long, and he’ll say 
“Want one?” It will feel like some kind of royalty 
has chosen you out of a crowd. You’ll say yes, even 
though you don’t really smoke, and for the next 
three months, you’ll do a lot of things that you 
don’t really do, just because you want him to think 
of you as 20 percent cooler than you are. And 
then he’ll sleep with someone else, and you’ll be 
devastated, mostly because it won’t even count as 
cheating — you never even declared yourselves a 
couple in the first place.
4. The one who changes around his friends. 
Your relationship will be like a secret that only the 
two of you can ever know about, and every time 
he’ll be in the same room as his friends, it’ll be 
like a light switch has suddenly been turned off. 
He’ll be cold, and sarcastic, and not want to do 
any of the charming, silly things the two of you 
like to do together in private. “I’ve seen you 
naked drinking milk in front of the refrigerator, 
you asshole,” you’ll think, “Don’t you act like 
you’re cool all of a sudden.” And suddenly, all 
you’ll want is for him to be kind in front of them, 
to prove that you’re not insane, and that the 
version of him you know in private really does 
exist. Then he’ll use the word “pussywhipped” in 
conversation once or twice, and you’ll realize that 
will never happen.
Then he’ll use the word “pussywhipped” in 
conversation once or twice, and you’ll realize that 
will never happen
5. The one who is already with someone. 
You’ll think that you can change him. You’ll think 
that, if you only present yourself as the perfect 
alternative to his current situation, he’ll leave her 
and fall madly in love with you. But all that will 
really do is make you hate her for no reason, and 
at best, make him cheat on her when he has the 
time. You’ll make your friends promise you that 
you’re not the other woman, even though everyone 
knows that you are, and somehow the only person 
who will get out of this situation without making 
any enemies will be him. And in four years, you’ll 
cringe at the person you were during that time.
6. The one who drinks too much coffee and is 
always working on a project. 
You’ll meet him in the back of a coffee shop, 
looking intensely at his computer screen and 
drinking what is likely his third Americano of the 
afternoon. He’ll be wearing earth tones and 
glasses, and everything about him will feel warm 
and passionate and deep. You’ll ask him questions 
and all of his answers will be vague, and challenge 
the very construct of the question itself. He will 
be “freelancing” and “between projects” and 
“working on something right now,” but you’ll never 
see anything tangible come of it. You’ll leave him 
a few months in, and a year later, you’ll see him 
at the same coffee shop. Only this time, it won’t 
seem intense or earthy, it will just seem sad.
7. The one who gets you into music, but doesn’t 
really share it. 
He’ll seem so thoughtful and cultured, and play 
you records (real ones, because the sound is 
just that much better) while the two of you share 
a joint on the mattress in his bedroom. You’ll be 
afraid to talk during any of the songs, because 
you don’t want to mess up the mood or seem like 
you don’t “get” it, and you’ll spend nights at 
home poring over his favorite bands’ catalogs to 
seem like you are as much of a real fan as he is, 
and not just pretending to like them. And when 
you break up, you’ll come to hate that whole 
genre of music — mostly because you’ll be ready 
to admit that you never liked it in the first place.
8. The one who “isn’t ready.” 
Everything will go perfectly, and make sense, and 
you’ll let yourself forget all of the signs from the 
beginning that it was never going to be serious. 
You’ll pretend not to notice when he doesn’t call 
you his girlfriend unless you do it first. You’ll 
pretend not to be bothered when he doesn’t offer 
to introduce you to his parents when they’re in 
town. You’ll pretend not to be devastated when, 
six months later, your whole relationship is 
reproduced with someone different than you, and 
he calls her his girlfriend every time he talks 
about her. You’ll keep telling yourself that he just 
“wasn’t ready” to settle down with someone, until 
you are finally far enough away from it to admit 
that he did want those things — he just didn’t 
want them with you.
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBGUr48AH6VM5dLLQVGK2jC5qaWhcIo0auWnIEdta-48wywwhuxWDKRcjXuB_IfAzsvzkBempo4UH91AYZx5uXcn78eqmkn1wDTivj3Px0oEOloyvBRiwJsJKCn5C8RuYX9Td8ng6QkzEd/s1600/yink-640x330_2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"> <img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiBGUr48AH6VM5dLLQVGK2jC5qaWhcIo0auWnIEdta-48wywwhuxWDKRcjXuB_IfAzsvzkBempo4UH91AYZx5uXcn78eqmkn1wDTivj3Px0oEOloyvBRiwJsJKCn5C8RuYX9Td8ng6QkzEd/s640/yink-640x330_2.jpg"> </a> </div>

8 Guys You Must Never, Under Any Circumstances, Fall In Love With

1. The one who messages you once a year to say something incredible. Every so often, you’ll wake up to a text or a Facebook message from him, something about how he thought of you last night, or how h…

05 Mar 2015

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